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Every flower must grow through dirt.



I turned off the hard white light of the ring light that was too strong for my eyes and closed my camera. I sensed my forehead relaxing and my ego dropping. Cameras were disabled in this department per company policy, so I would never see my client. The Zoom screen was black; these clients would never be exposed on camera.


The reserved voice politely explained how he respected everybody and wanted to become a better leader. I probed a little. Self-control prevailed as he diplomatically steered away from the answer. I reiterated the question. There was a long pauze as I heard him focusing in. His mind was looking at his fear, hesitating to touch it. He had come so close now, that a sudden tremble of his feelings overtook him faster than his thoughts, making him shift and surrender.


I stopped taking notes. I sensed how he dropped his shoulders, put his head in his hands, and sighed deeply. I heard a shiver in his voice. The timber dropped further, and a raw anger came out. I closed my eyes to feel the heavy emotions he was carrying. Again he sighted before he uttered: “You need to help me with this. I am so angry with myself. Why did I react so arrogant?” There was guilt, disappointment, and frustration all around. He continued: “I felt so humiliated and disrespected in how they questioned me. Do they not trust me? Maybe I don’t fit in so well. I am very shy.” Neither of us spoke. I sat with him in darkness and felt the essence of his pain. He repeated: “Please help me with this”.

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Mantra for meditation:

“Before we can change or move forward, we must first embrace where we are.”


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An hour later, my next client, a female voice, came in. Same. Black screen. No exposure to the camera. Would she expose her fears? She explained how calculative she was and how preparation helped her with high confidence levels. We discussed her goal for the next 4 months, and I asked her how we would measure success. She paused a moment before revealing her struggles.


“I often cannot make clear decisions as I am too stressed out. It is impacting my health a lot. I lose my sleep, and I get hypertension. I will notice improvements if I can sleep properly again, as I am overthinking and getting anxious. Please give me tactics to reduce the stress.”

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Collective insights from executives: remarkable growth


Over the past few months, I had the honor to work with a group of executives who wanted to look their challenges in the eye and make a change. They wanted to get unstuck, grow, become fearless, and inspire others. They were brave individuals. They asked for help and requested to hold up a mirror so they could see their blind spots.


They traveled deep inside and, in the final meeting, shared that they are most proud of achieving these outcomes:


  • Proficiency in stress management

  • Liberation from the fear of judgment, fostering authenticity

  • A shift from 'self-awareness' to 'acceptance'

  • ‘Responding’ instead of ‘reacting’ through tapping into the ‘power of choice’.

  • Acquiring active listening skills.

  • Transitioning focus with stakeholders from feeling ‘not good enough’ or being defensive towards collaboration and opportunities.

  • Leading with Empathy.

  • Navigating ‘difficult conversations’ with newfound ease.

  • Cultivating unshakeable confidence.


Challenges faced and realizations made:


Reflecting on their challenges—power dynamics, self-acceptance, accountability, facing fear and consistency—the executives grasped crucial realizations:

  • Communication's pivotal role

  • The universal potential for conscious choices

  • The continuity of personal growth beyond programs


My Reflections:


Mantra for meditation: “Everyone we meet is our teacher and student.”


While working with these executives, here are the five mindset shifts I realized are essential for Personal Growth:


  1. A flower seeks nourishment through its roots; our nourishment comes from Connection to others, which is rooted in Empathy.

  2. A flower soaks up the sunlight; we can nurture Presence in the moment by being patient and mindful.

  3. A flower adapts to different environments; we can learn to become Adaptable and resilient.

  4. A flower unfurls new fronds; we can foster Continuous Learning and open-mindedness.

  5. A thriving flower exudes vitality; to navigate challenges, we can choose to radiate Positive Energy.



Mantras for meditation:


“Each of us is greater and wiser than we appear to be.”


We all have endless potential as Ralph Waldo Emerson beautifully describes it: “The creation of a thousand forests is in one acorn.”


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We all get stuck sometimes in a vicious circle that shifts our focus away from our passion, and often, we don’t even realize what prevents us from moving forward. Through thought-provoking questions, in a safe and non-judgmental environment, I will invite you to walk the path to come to a decision that is 100% yours so you can be entirely at peace with the consequences. As a professional coach, I invite you to take a seat at my table. Reaching out is the first step to success and achieving your aspirations.


I am a lifestyle expat, a highly conscious female business leader, and a professional ICF-certified coach who invites you to overcome any challenges you encounter, in a way that aligns with your core values.


Please feel free to get in touch with me.


Sarah


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Picture & Text Copyrights: ©2023 This is my Table™

Copyright laws protect all content in this article. Unauthorized reproduction or distribution of any material without prior written permission from Sarah Debusscher (author) is strictly prohibited and punishable under the respective laws.

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